My Wife Has New Advertisement Solutions For Garry Conn Dot Com
My wife, Angie, is really NOT a blogger. She does her thing in a few parenting message boards and that is really about it. She has her home page set to Yahoo, hates Firefox and just doesn’t do the whole blog thing… however, she is supportive of me being a blogger and knows that I really enjoy doing what I do, and to be honest as long as the Google checks keep coming in, she really doesn’t give a rats ass if I blog, splog or play online poker. lol
With that being said, I had a rare moment tonight where she stood over my shoulder and I gave her a tour of my little galaxy within this huge universe of the blogosphere. I showed her many of the blogs that I like to read and visit and I showed her a lot of the popular blogs within my niche.
Making my rounds, we stumbled onto Jeremy Schoemaker’s site, ShoeMoney.com, and I proceeded to explain to her what Jeremy was all about and some of the things that he likes to do on his blog. A few minutes into giving Angie the tour of ShoeMoney.com, she saw this picture:
Her initial response was priceless…
She asks, “who the hell takes a picture of a box full of clothes? What the hell is this all about?” I explained to her that this is a picture of Jeremy holding up a box filled completely full of T-Shirts that people sent him.
“Why would anyone want to send that guy a T-Shirt, he looks weird?”, Angie continued on by saying, “Oh wait! I heard of this guy… that’s the shoe guy!!! this is that famous cross-dresser guy that did that popular YouTube video, called Shoes!”
[Watch Shoes - Remove the kids from the room, very bad language.]
At this point, I was laughing so hard I seriously couldn’t breath. I was truly laughing my ass off. It took me about five minutes to regain my composure and continue to explain to Angie why people mail Jeremy free T-shirts.
After wiping the tears of laughter from my eyes, I explained to her that people send in free T-shirt to ShoeMoney because every Friday, Jeremy takes a picture of himself with the shirt on. The shirt will have an advertisement which is basically a form of free advertising. He usually only wears the shirt once for the picture and then throws it in a box.
[example: CLICK HERE]
“What’s the point in that?”, she’s not happy with me at this moment because she feels like I was making fun of her during my laughing episode. I further explained to her more about who Jeremy is and why I found it just utterly hilarious that she linked him up as being the guy who performed in the video Shoes.
Maybe it’s just me… but I kind of feel like if any of my readers were in the same boat, this situation would have struck a funny bone too! OMG I couldn’t stop laughing.
With all that being said, Angie finally “got it” and instructed me to announce the following new programs that GCDC has to offer:
New GCDC Advertisement Program
(Direct From Garry’s Wife)
GCDC will now have the following advertisement programs in effect immediately:
- NoteBook (COMPUTER) November – Mail Garry Conn a brand new notebook and he’ll take a picture of himself holding it. The notebook will be turned on and the browser will be opened up FULL SCREEN to your website for free advertising on GCDC. Garry will promise NOT to throw the notebook in a box after the photo shoot.
* edit, thanks for the correction, HM3!
** Apple Macbook Air preferred. - Pay My Mortgage Monday – On the very last Monday of every month if you pay Garry and Angie’s mortgage, Garry will then take a picture of the invoice marked as paid with your business card clipped to it. It is suggested to make sure that your business card has your website address on it. As a bonus Garry will Digg and Stumble his own post to assure that you get the Ultimate advertising experience.
- Underwear Wednesday – Send Garry Conn underwear and he’ll take a picture with them on. You can advertise your message on the butt. Limited time only get two cheeks for the price of one. (This is a premium ad service – not free – Price $125,000 USD)
* Note: Thongs are not accepted nor are they an efficient form of marketing as your ad space is VERY LIMITED.
* * Please make sure the underwear you send is NOT USED. Photoshopping out brown marks will cost you an extra $50,000 USD.
As you can see, these are very effective forms of advertising. You can send all materials and money direct to Garry Conn. No refunds are accepted, all materials sent in will be kept, and Angie as well as myself will promise to laugh our ass off on the way to the bank.
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26 comments
Haha. Effective advertising! Let us know if someone really send you any of the above.
If I sell an underwear ad… My butt will be the last thing you see of me for awhile… because I’ll be on an extended vacation, still laughing!
Funny Stuff!! I really hope for our sake no one sends in an underwear ad!!!
LOL!!!
Tim,
If someone sends in an underwear ad request and pays $125,000 USD, I’ll personally mail you $1000 to cover the expenses due to blogger trauma.
Tell me you wouldn’t put a big 1024×768 pixel shot of your butt (with underwear on of course) on the home page of your blog for 30 days with an ad on it for $125k. LOL!!!!
My readers would have to just grin and bare it (no pun intended) for 30 days! Sorry…
hahaha, I couldn’t help but laugh at your wife’s advertising. Hmmm, ya better watch out their are some strange people out there with lots of cash. It would be pretty funny to see someone pay that much. Oh geez, I’m still laughing. Tell her she sure knows how to advertise and here I thought shirts were the best way to go…well besides my reviews of products. However a notebook would be really great at say….August/September time frame. But I’m guessing you want a notebook computer. Ya might want to correct that before you get a box full of school supplies.
-Garry, ok that’s it. That’s at least twice.
I sit down at the office, check email, oh look Garry has a new post, click, sip coffee, read, spew coffee all over desk from laughter.
And the picture in my head, it hurts, I must find a picture of Catherine Zeta Jones quick to flush out the Garry Conn underwear image……..
If you think your ass is that hot, you should call Calvin Klien and give Marky Mark a run for his money.
@ Eliza,
Yes indeed… a notebook COMPUTER is what we’re looking for here… But you know what, is someone mailed me a paper notebook, we do have three kids and it would totally be put to use too. LOL!!!
Ah… but so would a notebook computer.
@ David,
Very happy to discover that I did this to you again. I can totally vision you sitting behind your desk with a few people doing their thing in the background and then all of a sudden, they look and see you spilling your coffee, drooling every where and literally ROFL’ing. I might have to contact Blue Cross and Blue Shield to set up a Blogger’s Insurance policy that will protect you and provide coverages when you read my blog.
@ Collin,
In the world of advertising there is a huge difference between “hot and sexy” and simply “down outright EFFECTIVE” I think I have finally struck it rich… I have a goldmine and its my ass. I’ll even start a new section on my site titled: AssGarry!!!
AssGarry, Jesus thats funny shit (Not meant to be a pun either) If you need a link to a great home waxing kit let me know, I will be happy to help you out there. You can get Angie to do it for you to as I am sure she would love to help out. Don’t just try and shave it either because you can get a lot of pimples. Trust me, I know
Here you go Collin, just for you:
… I really love Google image search!
LMAO
Aside from all the humor, I have to say that Jeremy is a pretty smart individual. Free Shirt Friday is an amazing success. It is very creative, unique and totally trendy for this modern day of Internet marketing tactics.
It is actually entertaining to see the different facial expressions when he does these pictures. He doesn’t smile, grin… or do anything… he stands there like a lump on a log and has someone take the pic… Life really doesn’t get much easier than that. Oh… wait, he does include a paragraph of text that talks about the person or business who sent the shirt.
Many people forget the fact that he is a search engine marketing guru and not a search engine optimization guru. I am sure that he knows quite a bit about SEO, but the things he does with his blog is pretty cool.
Over the last few weeks, I have spent quite a bit of time on Shoe’s site as well as Chow’s… it is very interesting to study their sites and to learn a few things along the way.
That’s hilarious. Good luck with those promotions. Your new theme looks great. Emma
LMAO!!!!
That’s awesome.. I think your wife may be a marketing genius!
@ Emma,
Thanks for the compliments… I am known to change my themes like once a week, but in this case I SERIOUSLY have too much invested into this one to change it again … We’re all stuck with it. Very glad you like it.
@ Cindy,
Yes.. I know. I need therapy… Many many years of therapy. I have no shame!
@ Mathew,
You live with her for a week, and you’ll beg on your knees for her to let you say “screw it” I’ll get a job a K-Mart.
Your wife is a marketing genius! There’s no limit to that kind of strategy: food, makeup, ointments for rashes — endless I tell you!
LOL
Ok Mr. Mark!!! I’ll take a shot with me in a pair of submitted in skivvies, but I’ll be damned if i start cross dressing and wearing makeup like someone else we already know that does…
Hehe…this is the ultimate payoff though: you in skivvies (hopefully not used) holding a mac book with a mortgage payment in hand. Cha-ching!
Okay, I’ve gotta go watch TV or something to get that image out of my head now.
LOL!!! I just read your first post over again… OINTMENTS…
Good grief… you do need to watch TV, you’re mind has gone a$$tray for over 25 minutes according to the comment time stamps… dude, smoke must be coming out your ears… Tune into Dr. Phil tomorrow, it will help you… promise. Follow that up with a dose of Jerry Springer and it will have you begging for Prozac.
cute post until you got to the “new advertising methods” I was almost certain you were gonna go with the tshirt thing and it might work for you. You’ve got quite a bit of a following and great readers.
Even angie might get a few new shirts
Matthew,
Maybe the SHOE man can send me his shirt.
Thanks for playing along… I am glad you dropped by man, I haven’t seen you in awhile. How are thing going for you with BlogAboutYourBlog? I have always enjoyed that site.
I’m gonna laugh my ass off it you get a ton of spiral notebooks in the mail. LOL
Christine,
I will too… but you know what… bad breath is better than no breath… if people want to send me spiral notebooks, cool.
This is what your advertisement will look like:
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LOL
LOL LOL LOL
great dude!
Now where is the affiliate program?
*i’m serious
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